under the old spruce
soft breast exposed, song snuffed out
silent, still blackbird
fluttering feathers
ruffled by the morning breeze
life barely begun
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Poetry
Life barely begun
I made a sad discovery in the garden this morning
Reviews (3)
R
Rachel Gosling
9/9/2026
Thank you.
Berniethebard
9/9/2026
You are welcome.
Katharine Folkes
9/9/2026
The Words That Got to Me
soft breast exposed, song snuffed out silent, still blackbird sad, but good description life barely begun
A tenderly addressed occurrence in poetic form. I wonder what got him? Sad, but well done. Of course, I've got to comment on the difference between your blackbird and ours. Our black birds are very dark black all over, and they don't sing. They have a loud CAW, CAW. How lovely that yours sing.
R
Rachel Gosling
9/9/2026
The grown-up male is black with a yellow beak and has a beautiful song. The female and youngsters are brown.
Rachelle Allen
9/9/2026
The Words That Got to Me
soft breast exposed, song snuffed out *you've caught such vulnerability in this perfect description
I love Haiku because they are so impactful when done right. And this one is "shining example" right. Soft...but with a huge "kapow" in its undertow. Exceptional work. xoxo
R
Rachel Gosling
9/9/2026
Thank you!
9/8/2026
Nice use of the haiku form for your poem. And i like the scattered alliterative phrases. The phrase that, for me, expresses the tender vulnerability of this poem is "soft breast exposed."