Back to Stories
Poetry

California On My Mind

Written in response to a prompt to write a poem about a tree.

BerniethebardSeptember 7, 202644 views
California On My Mind

It was way back in the summer of 1972.

I went to where, in the pictures, the sky always seemed to be blue.

For me it was the state of Laurel Canyon and the Beach Boys

where the waves, birds and insects were the dominant background noise.

Get in that open top hire car driving through Pacific Grove.

Seventeen miles of God's creation, every beach, every cove.

But there's one special thing that I, and others, have come to see

akin to a pilgrimage like seeing God's face in a tree.

It seeded before the independence of the USA,

been battered by wind, shrouded in fog, showered in ocean spray.

Standing atop a granite headland that's shaped like Gibraltar,

like a sentry, alone like some jilted groom at the altar.

You could almost believe the bluff was put there just for this tree.

Once there I feel it's a place steeped in spirituality.

There are some who take a photo, shrug and then move quickly on.

To go near would be like having an illicit liaison.

Supported now by steel cables, its very own Zimmer Frame.

Once you've spent time with the Lone Cypress you'll never be the same.

Story image

Reviews (2)

Sign in to leave a review

The Words That Got to Me

where the waves, birds and insects were the dominant background noise. *I swear, I read this and immediately heard it all!!! like a sentry, alone like some jilted groom at the altar. *This is Classic BernietheBard fare right here!! So, so exceptional. Zimmer Frame. *Thank you for making me smarter today (you seem to do that a L OT!!) I had to look this one up.

Hmmm. Either I lead a very sheltered and cloistered existence (not impossible...) or I've become a NY xenophobe who espouses that nothing good could exist on the opposite coast. All I can tell you, Bernie, is that of this is brand new to me. So, thank you for enlightening me and evoking so much curiosity that I'm going to be researching this further! It's fascinating! Also, the musician in me feels that this kind of reads like a song the Beach Boys would produce, doesn't it? Was that your thought when you composed it? It has that kind of dreamy, a little bit bouncy, but mostly "rockin'" sense to it that was their signature. Anyway, for any number of reasons, this is a piece I enjoyed very much. Thank you! xoxo

In my late teens, early 20s California was THE place for me. I love that era Beach Boys and for you to mention them in your comment in the way you do makes my heart sing. Thank you for that. Trees are sentient, spiritual beings, deserving of our eternal care and respect. Love the lines you picked out. xoxo

Tim Margetts

9/8/2026

The Words That Got to Me

“Standing atop a granite headland that's shaped like Gibraltar, like a sentry, alone like some jilted groom at the altar.” Brilliant. And seeing the pictures, I immediately get it. “You could almost believe the bluff was put there just for this tree.” Indeed, it could have been built just to grant it a place to set down roots.

Suggestions / Possible Tweaks

“I went to where, in the pictures, the sky always seemed to be blue.” The commas are grammatically defensible, but I felt they interrupted the opening rhythm.

The strongest thing in this poem, Bernie, is that you didn't just describe a tree. You took me with you on a journey to discover it. There is this wonderful mix of reverence and humour. A mix of God and pilgrimage bound together with a jilted groom and a Zimmer frame. That juxtaposition takes something that could have been too sombre and lifts it. I have never been to California; I may well never go, but this poem helped me feel just a touch of its grandeur.

Thank you very much for your detailed comments. Yes i did want this to come across as not just a description of a tree but as almost a reverence for it as you mention in your words. I am really pleased that aspect came across to you. I take your point about the flow of the line you pick out. I am also glad my words helped you feel what being in California can be like.