She’s putting me on—her brand new, good looking reading glasses. I have to admit, I am tres chic.
What are we reading this time? Hmmm, a Stephen King book. I’m not wild about him. Scary dude. He’s got a strange imagination. I wonder if he was ever sent to his room as a kid. With the lights off and the door locked? And left there ….for a week…. Heh heh, heh heh, heh, heh.
Oooo, I don’t like this. Vamanos! Hurry. Turn the page. What? She took me off! She’s chewing on my ear piece. OW! I’m brand new, remember? Maybe she’s scared. Maybe she just had an idea. Maybe she’s hungry. Well, I am not food.
Except …. food for thought? Yes! That’s it. But it hurts (not the idea) (if she had one) the chewing. Does she ever think of that? Noooo, just chomps away, teeth marks all over me, ruining my cool, black, svelte look, aging me with every chew. Now she’s twirling me in her hand. Oh, I’m getting see-sick. (a little pun there.)
She must be having a humdinger of an idea. She puts me on top of her head. Is she not aware that it stretches the ear pieces? ‘Course, a good stretch is supposed to be good for you. (You, not me.)
The phone is ringing somewhere. Now I’m off again. She drops me in the chair and runs to find her cell phone. Maybe when she gets back, she’ll put me on and forget about old Stephen King and she’ll write something wonderful—with my help, of course—we’re a team!
Here she comes …. Still talking on the phone.
Oh, no …she’s going to si..
10/4/2026
The Words That Got to Me
Scary dude. He’s got a strange imagination. I wonder if he was ever sent to his room as a kid. With the lights off and the door locked? And left there ….for a week…. *I agree! I saw him interviewed once on, I believe, Good Morning America, and he was talking about how at the breakfast table with his brand-newly-received manuscript, his daughter was fooling around and accidentally spilled a bottle of milk that got all over it. He paused - a chilling pause - and said quietly, "And I felt an alligator snap in the back of my head." YIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIKES!! As you said: VERY scary man!!! Oh, no …she’s going to si.. *HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Oh, I’m getting see-sick. (a little pun there.) *Ohhh, come ONNNNNN, Katharine!! So bad.
Okay, this is priceless!!! Hilarious, creative and absolutely delightful. What a super fun read!! You are such a clever writer, Katharine. xoxo